Friday, September 12, 2008

Donate to me now

I've decide to launch a bid for the presidency. The goal, should I fall short of the votes needed to win, will be to steal away as many votes from McCain as I possibly can. To help me do that, I've decided to ask Tonya Harding to be my VP. Why Tonya? True, there's the risk of alienating the figure-skating bloc, but I think the pros outweigh the cons:
  • She's female, and we know from the Republicans that women vote gender, not issues.
  • Who hasn't wanted to bust some kneecaps from time-to-time? Especially the kneecaps of, say, ex-brothers-in-law?
  • There's no such thing as bad publicity. And if there is bad publicity, it's all a vast left-wing conspiracy by the liberal media and Washington elite to attack this poor, defenseless creature. It's sexist, too.

Thank you in advance for your large cash donation.

1 comment:

Sherry said...

I am behind you!!! Just don't fall backwards okay?

Today - I put Obama T's on my Monkeys and put lipstick on my pigs (stuffed but heck - the point remains the same). Good choice of Tanya for a running mate. I dont think any pitbull would take on a club, heck pitbulls have four knees....

Think about it, the VP debates could be in an arena, something like a boxing match. Probably be protested by those damn left wing animal rightists!

Just too bad I am Canadian and up here, animals are not allowed to enter elections, thats considered cruelty.